I don't actually know what we are supposed to know. So I can't really say "who knew" cause I don't really have anything that seems so amazingly logical but yet I just realized it. Nope...don't have it...and...can't say that. But I'm saying it, anyway.
I'm supposed to be losing weight on this supervised weightloss program that I'm supposed to "fail".
And it appears I've gained a pound. Woke up Saturday and it was there - although...last week. Man....
Through the week I gained two pounds. So Saturday I was actually down one from that which meant I was still UP one. But since I was down one on Saturday and I could wear certain clothes to my appt in a week and a half to show weightloss that was unaccounted for at my last appt, I thought if I had to make it work, then at least I could be ok. And then Sunday made it all better. I was down a pound and a half. So this is good. Right? Until I got up today. And I'm back up.
I can still wear certain clothes. But now I'm just flat out scared.
What happens if I gain weight on this "unweightloss" program, as I like to call it. What happens if I can do this tricky stuff for this weigh in but on my very last appt I'm up and I'm just up? Will all six months be for nothing? Or do they really mean what they say - I'm supposed to fail?
I feel stuck. I feel like man oh man but I wish I had the band - cause I could go get a fill.
I've plateaued. I know that. And I know that one of the remarkable things about the band is that (from where I sit anyway) when you plateau - you get a fill. When you are starving all the time - you get a fill. I'm starving all the time. I've plateaued. I think I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be to say "yep, the band is right for me" - but....BUT....I already thought that!
And what happens if this means I've failed incorrectly and I have to start over? Argh, the stress is killing me!
Ok...not really. I'm not being killed. Last week I was stressed because of so many different factors. This week I generally feel better and when I feel better I tolerate stress better.
But I really am worried. I just want this to be over. I want this to be over, I want the scale to respond appropriately, and I want to have a pile of paperwork to submit to the insurance company that the insurance company won't say "no" to.
I'm literally thinking of fasting for the rest of this week. But before I go completely bonkers...I'm trying a full on Atkins diet this week. And if that doesn't work - then next week, I'll try fasting...
That's healthy, right?
Aside from all this shtuff that is just weighing on my mind - I had a great weekend! How about you?
Friday night my sweet hubby and I finally made it to see "The Blind Side". Has anyone seen that? We are both football junkies and have wanted to see it since it came out. But Christmas was busy and things kept popping up. We are glad we saw it on the big screen. It's a great movie. And that's all I'll say!
Saturday was nice and lazy. We should have been working on a project we have self-imposed a deadline for but we decided to just not. We haven't had a lazy day like that in quite awhile. Saturday night we went over to a neighbors house for a bbq and had a nice evening with friends. Sunday was a different sort of day with a lot of prepping for friends coming over to watch the AFC and NFC championship games. I know Sunday didn't help my weightloss cause as I cooked a pork roast that was then shredded and cole slaw...
Sigh...
But the friends showed up and we watched football. I was pleased with the Saints/Vikings game - but I would have been ok with either team winning. In some ways, though, I'm happier the Saints won. It's just remarkable the turnaround they've had and the Vikings sure didn't play like a Super Bowl candidate last night. The Jets/Colts...well...I think I'd rather have had the Jets but I don't hate the Colts so it is what it is.
And last but not least, I'm blogging here now but there will be changes to this here blog over the next week. I want to get my page more "me" and I will be bringing over the blogs from LBT slowly but surely. I'm not going to backtrack with my thoughts to say what I've said elsewhere - but I see I have followers who I don't think knew me on LBT...so maybe once those blogs get over here I will make more sense.
I thought that was my last but not least, but before I could click "PUBLISH POST", my sweet wonderful hubby called! He was told in November that they were putting his name in for a promotion. His department is being reorganized. We thought this meant his boss was being promoted to "Director" and that my sweet hubby would move into that manager's old position. But the bad side of this was he "might not get a pay raise for this upward promotion". He got the promotion, today. He is moving into his bosses position and the boss is moving up, as well. And furthermore, he DID get a payraise! What a fantabulous Monday!
Now if I could just lose a measely little pound or two...
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YAY for the payraise...in this economy, that says a lot about what they think of DH!!!
ReplyDeleteDon't sweat the pound too much, not sure if your insurance has the same rules, but mine was just looking at the overall loss...they considered 5-10# overall a loss (if I had gained even a pound OVERALL since the beginning they would deny me) and that I tried, but was a failure since I didn't lose more than 10#. If you're worried, call the ins. person at your surgeon's office and ask. Happy Monday! -BG