05/28/10: Fridays, Memorial Day Weekends, and Fills

• I get a fill today at 1pm.  I can't wait.  I hope it does something for me!
• Did you know a thin crust pizza slice (from a large pizza) has 300 calories in it?  To be clear, a thin crust from Pizza Hut with light sauce (I hate sauce!) and cheese (not extra, just the normal that they put on) and sausage and beef and onions and black olives.
• If you don't know that before you eat the pizza...then you probably will eat too much.
• I did.
• Eat too much that is.
• 3 slices.
• Last night.
• Then I went to see what the damage was with my meal logging through my GoBe.  Yeah.  I had to find a website where I could recreate this pizza.  And then I did.  And I learned that each slice was 300 calories.
• That's more than I'm getting in entire meals, more often than not, nowadays.
• I got mad.
• And then I got sad.
• And then I got madder.
• And then I got frustrated.
• So I worked out harder.
• But I'm still mad.
• I don't even like pizza all that much. 
• What's even weirder...before I was banded...two pieces was more than plenty for me.  Now...with a band...I wanted three.  Are you kidding me?
• And then to discover three was 900 calories!  So totally not worth it.  I don't even like pizza all that much.
• It's not hard for me to say I will never eat pizza again.  I don't even like pizza all that much and it certainly isn't worth 300 calories a danged slice!
• Do you notice that on the evening before a fill...you eat like it might be your last meal?
• On the way home last night...driving along...there were a number of places I wanted to stop to get a little this or a little that...cause I may never get to again.
• It's weird.  Thus far with my band, it seems I can eat most anything just in a lot smaller amounts.  So why would I think I needed to have last-meal-itis before a fill?
• I didn't mention a thing about any of the this's or that's I wanted.  Just the pizza...which I then immediately followed with "I don't really want it, though".  To which my hubby replied "I do".  And then a conversation ensued about how I would actually be able to eat a slice right now cause I HAVE NO RESTRICTION!
• So we got the pizza.
• Dangit.
• Still ended the day with 1,326 calories.
• And then walked and jogged longer than my normal warmup to "punish" myself.  Then lifted weights.
• I had the best workout I've had thus far.  Calorie burn was 336.  That's almost 100 calories more than the last time I did this workout - same weights, same reps, same sets, same exercises.
• My 3 slices of pizza also meant 1000mg of sodium...per slice.  3000 mg of sodium in three slices.  That's enough for a whole week!  So the scale said the exact same number today that it did yesterday.  I think if I hadn't had that sodium it would have been down two pounds.  I was down last night before I ate that pizza.  I'm never down during a day.  I'm always at my lowest in the morning but when I got home from work last night, I weighed less than I did when I left for work.  I think the sodium jacked me up!
• That and the fat.  And the carbs.
• Dangit - pizza just aint worth all this!
• I don't even really like pizza!
• I won't be eating pizza again.  It just aint worth it.
• I know some people don't want to track calories and I can understand why.  I don't want to track calories, either, and won't do so forever.  But it's enlightening to discover exactly where and how I've been going so wrong.  Pizza has never been a staple for me - I don't really like it! - but it does get on the plate on occasion.  And if that followed what used to be a normal lunch and a normal breakfast and even snacks - it's easy to see that a harmless slice of pizza could completely derail a healthy diet!  I don't really like the stuff so now I can say I just won't eat it.  It's just not worth it.  If I'm gonna get excess calories from something I'd rather it be something GOOD!  And pizza just aint good to me!
• And while I didn't eat pizza all that often before...I'm sure I'd do something like have pizza on Friday then have something sinful on Saturday and something sinful on Sunday and it's too easy to see how the whole weekend was derailed because I was thinking pizza "wasn't that bad".
• What's odd...I have done calorie counting before.  But never with the intent of keeping calories below 1200 or even 1000.  It was always keeping it right at 2000 or something insanely high.  So apparently none of this stuck in my head before.  Sad.
• Very very sad.

• I get my fill today at 1pm.
• I can't wait.
• I hope it does something for me.
• My stomach won't stop growling and it's irritating me. 
• My stomach rarely ever growled before the band.
• And my calorie counts, before the band, were generally in the 1200-1400 range, with occasional bad days in the 1800 range.  (At least on the "unweightloss" program.)
• I hate that my stomach growls.  It makes me want to eat so I can stifle it.
• And then I eat 3 slices of pizza.
• Dangit.

• I'm wearing my new Old Navy jeans in size 18 today.  They are too big in the bottom/waist and, what I consider, too little in the legs.  Turns out they are skinny jeans.  I don't really like skinny jeans on me.  My husband said they are sexy.
• My legs are getting definition.
• Doing that ol' leg in the air trick last night...you know...that trick that makes the fat fall away and the muscle appear?...yeah...the calves are looking mighty fine and the thighs are shapely and toned.  And then I put my leg back down on the ground and reality sets back in....
• But there was a time when I'd do the leg in the air trick and the legs still looked fat and ugly.  So it's nice to see shape and muscle - not fat and ugly.  A minor NSV.

• It's Memorial Day weekend.  I'm excited about having Monday off.
• Memorial Day weekend confuses me.  Some people say it's to remember those who have fought for our nation and died.  Others say it's to remember anyone who has fought for our nation and who is alive or dead.  I can't say it's for anyone, personally, cause that would include me - and I don't need to be remembered on this day, for this reason, necessarily.  I want to remember those who gave the ultimate sacrifice in protecting our nation.  So that's what I choose to believe it is.  I wish everyone could get on the same page for once and for all.  But I suppose that's part of the glory of the USA - we don't have to agree.  Even down to the purpose of Memorial Day.
• I am also hosting a support group meeting for ladies that live in my area on Sunday.  (Katie, if you care to come down you are more than welcome.  I know it's a drive but thought I'd put it out there.  Send me an email if interested.)  There will be 5 of us this weekend - the group is growing.  I will make a few of my high protein/low-no carb/low fat faves to share with the ladies - as another member did last month in her home.  I like that we are a small group, well, it could be bigger, it could be smaller - but by "small", I'm talking about unaffiliated with a bariatric practice, of banded people who found each other through LBT.  We don't have to listen to a nutritionist go on on their mighty soapbox.  We don't have to let a surgeon dominate us.  We just get to talk about real life and real situations and learn from each other and just laugh and have fun.
• My husband is getting kicked out of the house for this meeting.  He will go golfing with some buddies.  At 2pm.  On a Sunday.  In Texas heat.  And it's not nice right now....

And that's about all I got.

Have a great weekend, y'all!