12/14/10: Clothing

I have a pile of clothing in my closet waiting to be sent out to the sisterhood.  I'm thinking this pile will be dealt with sometime in the month of January. 

The funny thing about this pile of clothing is that it literally doubled this weekend.  On Sunday, to be exact.

Sunday, we went to church.  I wore some pants that I love.  Pants are my benchmark for shrinking.  Not much happens up top.  If history serves me well, I have at least 40 more pounds to lose before my tops go down in size.  But pants...pants change a tad bit more quickly.  I'll go down 2-3 sizes in pants in those next 40 pounds.  If history serves me well, I'll end up at about a medium on top and a 9 on bottom.  I can't see making it to that "perfect" size 6 or even 8...I have too much muscle mass and I always have.  Always.  Tiny little waist (historically speaking) and great big ol powerhouse thighs.  Used to hate that...and now I love that. 

Anywho, I digress....

So I went to church on Sunday and wore a pair of my favorite pants.  While pregnant, these pants were starting to get...um...not...comfortable.  But...of course...things are changing.  Sunday, I put these pants on and, seeing as how they were just washed, they "fit".  But these pants, like many others that I own, "relax" about 15 minutes into the wearing.  And these pants "relaxed" to be hanging on me.  Like the skin of my legs was not touching the pants anywhere.  It was literally just the waist - sagging on my hips - that was skin on cloth touching.  So...um...big.

I've asked my hubby to be my gauge for when things need to get added to the sisterhood pile.  He swears he'll tell me.  I have basically told him exactly how to compliment me.  He's a man.  Need I say more?

So...once home from church, I decided to try on pants.

Now, in my closet, I had a pile of jeans/capris/shorts that fit right now (let's call it pile one).  I had a pile of jeans/shorts/capris that will fit in just a few more pounds (let's call it pile two).  And I had a pile of jeans/shorts/capris that will be my next size down (let's call it pile three).  These piles consisted of 18's and 16's.  Some small 18's, some real 18's, some large 18's and the same for the 16's.

I have one pair of jeans I've been wearing for the past two or three months because they were the only pair that "relaxed" just exactly how I liked.  Another pair...relaxed...into falling off.  That shoulda been a clue.  But this one pair...they stayed consistently "right".  I always figured, when those were falling off, it would be time for pile two.  Pile three is a long way off.

So Sunday, I try on all that's in pile one, the one I'm currently wearing.  Four things.  Three went into the sisterhood.  The fourth would be - but they need to be washed.  They'll go in the sisterhood pile this week.

I try on all that's in pile two thinking nothing is going to work since I haven't lost any weight since September, when I tried these the last time.  All 18's in this pile but "real" 18's, not Old Navy 18's.  Yeah.  Out of the eight things in the pile, four things went into the sisterhood.

So, wanting to see how far away pile three is from reality, I try that all on.  2 very small 18's and 4 large 16's.  The 2 - 18's - into the sisterhood pile.  The 4 - 16's...2 are in the sisterhood pile.

So, my jeans/shorts/capris selection has just jumped by a gazillion-fold...but I missed the wearing window on quite a few pairs of pants!

And apparently, I can officially say I'm a 16 on bottom!!!

This morning, I'm looking at my work clothes rack and thinking just how uninterested in my work clothes I am.  I want to move on.  So I drag out the rack two stuff...16's.  Stuff that was snug back in September, last time I tried.  Wearing a pair now...and I'm swimming in them.

Yikes...when the 16's in work clothes are gone, I'ma have to go shopping.  I don't think I'm ready for that....

That and all my jackets fit right now.  ALL of them.  All the teeny tiny leather jackets I bought in Turkey, all the teeny tiny jackets I had made in Hong Kong or Japan...they all fit.  I have some gorgeous clothes that I bought as I navigated the globe back in 2005 and I see the window slamming shut on wearing this stuff.  Hand embroidered floor length silk jack with a gorgeous floral design...and nowhere to wear it.  Some of this stuff will have to get tailored down with me.  That's all there is to it.  I just hope it can be!

It's funny...knowing I'm getting closer and closer to shopping.  I don't want to.  I don't want to invest in nice stuff I'll wear briefly.  I don't want to waste money on cheap stuff I can part with quickly.  I just don't want to spend any money on clothes until I am at goal.  And I have 60 pounds to go.  60 pounds and a lot of sizes.  So while this should all be good news that I'm shrinking and moving clothes through my closet...I don't see happiness here.  I see stress.  How to handle this?  What to think?  What to do?  Oh well, I'll figure it out - I always do....